In this reflective essay, renowned Romanian essayist Adrian Gabriel Dumitru delves into the deeper meaning of life’s struggles, negativity, and the illusions that shape our existence. Dumitru offers a candid look at how we often find ourselves trapped in cycles of negativity, questioning the nature of life itself. Through his personal experiences and philosophical insights, he encourages readers to view life as a karmic journey rather than a series of unfortunate events, urging us to embrace the lessons hidden in the illusion and seek spiritual growth.
I’ve been dominated many times by negativity.
And … i hate i’ve allowed that to happen … so, so many times.
In fact … my whole life could be defined as that.
Unfortunately … under the influences of negativity … i did not had clarity anymore.
So … i’ve allowed myself to be overwhelmed of emotions … ignoring all i knew about the philosophy of life … or spirituality.
Ignoring in fact that annoying concept which claims that … life itself is an illusion.
I hated that conclusion.
I hated it … and couldn’t accept it.
So … I thought all is actually the representation of negativity… repeated to me on and on and on.
In fact … most certainly i could not understand the word… karmic … its representation … meaning or importance.
Maybe … even worst … cause i was ignoring all.
I couldn’t see any connection between philosophy or spirituality and my own life … believing that into the real life there are totally different things which are defining the dynamic of all.
Fortunately or unfortunately … again and again … all was repeating to me.
… in all the aspects of my life.
Until … one day … when having enough of all … i’ve understood that the Universe was trying to whisper me something.
But … of course … i was too idiot to see it.
And … the Universe …. was keep trying and trying … and trying to make me understand something … which I pretended so, so good … I didn’t know what is it about.
So … all was looking like an ugly life, dominated only by negativity … experiencing just stupid circumstances.
Day by day … the same … the same … the same.
Feeling offended … i’ve dare to ask the Universe … “Why are you doing this to me?! Why my whole life is a … charade?! Why can’t we stop this ugly experiences?!”
But … the Universe was not listening to me … ignoring all my prayers.
Maybe … I didn’t knew to connect to the Universe for real … and this is why …. nobody bothered to listen my complains.
So … I’ve started to analyse all deeper … trying to see the connection between my own life and the concepts which were defining the life itself… concluding that all is a charade.
Maybe … a karmic charade.
Somehow repeated to me so that I understand my meaning in here … my lessons for this life … and … the new paths i need to follow for my … spiritual evolution.
Most certainly … i had to shut up … stop complaining … and meditate more and more.
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